This is an excellent short course in Han Chinese.
If you are serious about this, make sure you speak with a Chinese accent, or it may take a bit longer.

Also, be sure to practice out loud! Impress your neighbours !!

Learn Chinese in 5 minutes

ENGLISH PHRASE CHINESE INTERPRETATION

Are you harbouring a fugitive ?
See me A.S.A.P.
Stupid Man
Small Horse
Did you go to the beach?
I bumped into a coffee table
I think you need a facelift
It's very dark in here
Has your flight been delayed ?
That was an unauthorized execution
I thought you were on a diet
This is a tow away zone
Do you know the lyrics to the Macarena?
You are not very bright
I got this for free
I am not guilty
Please, stay a while longer
Our meeting was scheduled for next week
They have arrived
Stay out of sight
He's cleaning his automobile
Your body odour is offensive
Pew! Does this bathroom stink
Chinese couple's retarded child
Hu Yu Hai Ding ?
Kum Hai Nao
Dum Gai
Tai Ni Po Ni
Wai Yu So Tan?
Ai Bang Mai Ni
Chin Tu Fat
Wai So Dim?
Hao Long Wei Ting?
Lin Ching
Wei Yu Mun Ching?
No Pah King
Wai Yu Sing Dum So
Yu So Dum
Ai No Pei
Wai Hang Mi?
Wai Go Nao?
Wai Yu Kum Nao?
Hia Dei Kum
Lei Lo
Wa Shing Ka
Yu Stin Ki Pu
Hu Flung Dung?
Sum Ting Wong

Found at
http://your-joking.atspace.co.uk/