New Warnning Labels
Due to increasing product liability litigation, American beer brewers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed on all beer containers:
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the morning
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with other members of the opposite sex without spitting
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invincible
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy
YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!!
Found at
http://your-joking.atspace.co.uk/